The fight. It’s never about the schedule. The laundry. The dishes. The kids. Who gets a break. It’s always about connection, recognition, power and control. If your fights sound the same, which they almost always do, stop and think about it. What need, vulnerability or bias is getting triggered again and again and again. Ask “what’s really going on here?” … Read More
Virtual therapy I see people in their offices. In parked cars. Sitting on the…
Virtual therapy I see people in their offices. In parked cars. Sitting on their deck. With toddlers on their lap. Couples in their living rooms. Hiding in bathrooms for privacy. In locked bedrooms sitting in their bed. In various time zones and provinces. Sometimes, more often than you’d think, I only hear voices on the other line of the phone. … Read More
Relationships. As a couples therapist I want to say something to everyone in a…
Relationships. As a couples therapist I want to say something to everyone in a relationship: Relationships change over time. They have to. Because… You change over time, constantly in development from year to year. It’s called lifespan development. Milestones change us. Children, jobs, self awareness, failures, lessons, life events. Your partner changes, just like you. And because of this, our … Read More
Relationship advice. Here is some free relationship advice (from a human who i…
Relationship advice. Here is some free relationship advice (from a human who is in a relationship but routinely gets it wrong, but who happens to read, study and learn on this topic…). So, I’m an “expert” in theory, and struggle in practice, because like you I’m also human with a host of issues and lots of trauma. That said, here … Read More