Virtual therapy I see people in their offices. In parked cars. Sitting on their deck. With toddlers on their lap. Couples in their living rooms. Hiding in bathrooms for privacy. In locked bedrooms sitting in their bed. In various time zones and provinces. Sometimes, more often than you’d think, I only hear voices on the other line of the phone. … Read More
Trigger warning When you own a business you are “told” directly or indirectly…
Trigger warning ⚠️ When you own a business you are “told” directly or indirectly to stay silent on matters of political, religious or socially contentious issues. And this is especially true as a therapist because I don’t want to alienate anyone; I value diversity of human beliefs and I’m trained to keep my countertransference and biases in line. I can’t … Read More
Anxious thoughts. Anxious thoughts are powerful because they are automatic. To…
Anxious thoughts. Anxious thoughts are powerful because they are automatic. Total automatic asshole thoughts. Here’s 10 questions to ask yourself to help fight them off. 1) Is it “true”? 2) How do I know it’s true? 3) Is the anxious thought 100% true? (something less than 100% true is not true) 4) What’s the evidence against it being true? 5) … Read More
Blue Monday. On Monday, January 17th we will have reached “Blue Monday”. The t…
Blue Monday. On Monday, January 17th we will have reached “Blue Monday”. The third Monday in January is dubbed the most depressing day of the year. A combination of post holiday reality, dark days and long nights, and colder weather prevail. Not to mention the holiday bills and the reality that most New Year’s resolutions don’t make it past this … Read More
Courage. The brave souls who book the appointment and invite another into thei…
Courage. The brave souls who book the appointment and invite another into their story are perhaps the most courageous people I’ve ever met. Brave conversations take a willingness to be deeply vulnerable. They take trust, even when in short supply. They require openness and equal parts vast discomfort. Brave space conversations require collaboration and joint curiosity. Together we fill the … Read More
Burnout. In the book “Down Girl: The Logic of Misogyny” by Kate Manne, a fasci…
Burnout. In the book “Down Girl: The Logic of Misogyny” by Kate Manne, a fascinating concept is introduced: Human Giver Syndrome. Human Giver Syndrome is the belief that some people (the givers) are supposed to exist to put all of their energy into creating comfort and success for other people, and to be attractive and available, physically and emotionally, at … Read More
More than a few chapters. In the story that is my life I’ve experienced many c…
More than a few chapters. In the story that is my life I’ve experienced many chapters. Like many of you, some chapters are pretty awful. I’ve survived: Childhood traumas Eating disorder Parentification Victimization Learning disability Poverty Relationship violence Emotional / psychological abuse Dysfunctional family patterns Where I’ve been is not where I am today. Those chapters will not define me. … Read More
Questions The questions I get, every day: 1) what’s wrong with me? 2) when w…
Questions The questions I get, every day: 1) what’s wrong with me? 2) when will I stop being this way? 3) does that make sense? 4) why am I like this? 5) is there something wrong with me? Answers: 1) you are a human having a human experience, the full range of emotions and responses to this jagged life. 2) … Read More
Under water or on the rise? Sometimes I can’t tell the difference between feel…
Under water or on the rise? Sometimes I can’t tell the difference between feeling under water with workload, stress, self doubt and the feeling of coming up for air, cresting the high water mark, and rising above until that moment I realize, “I’m ok again”. That’s because the energy it takes to rise up, resist the default setting and fight … Read More
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