Afterwards. The afterwards. In our moments of deepest pain, grief, betrayal, and hurt we do not think about what will come next. The “afterwards”. A hostage in the moment. Time standing still. Caught in the firestorm. Washed over by the wave. A narrowed focus. A nightmare becomes real, and a trauma is lived. But there is an afterwards. After the … Read More
Weight I know it’s stupid… It shouldn’t matter…. I don’t know why this bothe…
Weight I know it’s stupid… It shouldn’t matter…. I don’t know why this bothers me so much…. I’m body positive, why do I care? It’s so trivial… But is it? When your life is predicated on daily and often moment to moment unwelcome and obtrusive thoughts about how you don’t measure up, are not enough, are a failure, have disappointed … Read More
Beware. Beware the “influencer”. I don’t know about you but I can sure get s…
Beware. Beware the “influencer”. I don’t know about you but I can sure get sucked into something. And it’s a real piss off because I’m 46 years old with a good head on my shoulders. I’m talking about those people who are master influencers. The kind that fool you. The kind that sell wellness and health in a way you … Read More
Crisis Crisis is the mother of (re)invention of the self. You can’t go back af…
Crisis Crisis is the mother of (re)invention of the self. You can’t go back after a crisis because you are changed. But not necessarily for the worse. Did you know that personality is not set? In 2012 academics found as many participants as possible of a Scottish study conducted in 1947 on personality. At the time of the study, participants … Read More
Relationship advice. Here is some free relationship advice (from a human who i…
Relationship advice. Here is some free relationship advice (from a human who is in a relationship but routinely gets it wrong, but who happens to read, study and learn on this topic…). So, I’m an “expert” in theory, and struggle in practice, because like you I’m also human with a host of issues and lots of trauma. That said, here … Read More
Relational brain. Interpersonal neurobiology is the study of how our brains and…
Relational brain. Interpersonal neurobiology is the study of how our brains and central nervous system are developed through childhood relationships and how these relationships, imprinted into our psyche, impact and influence our neurobiology as adults. It’s been proven that we can co-regulate one another’s nervous systems. I do it everyday with my clients. Influencing cortisol (stress hormones – not all … Read More
Price adjustment. Yep, I’m more expensive than I was last week. Because life…
Price adjustment. Yep, I’m more expensive than I was last week. Because life is that much more expensive, too. Not much we can do about it but practice acceptance and move on. My rates have been adjusted (increased) and now include GST. But to keep it in perspective – I’m still offering sessions at (significantly) reduced rate to those of … Read More
Revolution. The revolution will start internal. When you come to the place w…
Revolution. The revolution will start internal. When you come to the place where you can hold space. For your truth. For your needs. For your voice. For your age. For your thighs. For every mistake and regret. For all that is you. The revolution belongs to you. You will rage quietly or loudly against the social structures and the messages … Read More
On self kindness. If your internal dialogue isn’t very nice, it’s very likely …
On self kindness. If your internal dialogue isn’t very nice, it’s very likely that if you spoke to other people the way you speak to yourself, well, you’d have no friends. That was stupid. Why do you always mess things up. What’s wrong with you? You are getting so fat. You are so ugly. You can’t ever get it right. … Read More
Courage. The brave souls who book the appointment and invite another into thei…
Courage. The brave souls who book the appointment and invite another into their story are perhaps the most courageous people I’ve ever met. Brave conversations take a willingness to be deeply vulnerable. They take trust, even when in short supply. They require openness and equal parts vast discomfort. Brave space conversations require collaboration and joint curiosity. Together we fill the … Read More